I went to the climbing gym Saturday morning, I was kind of disheveled but the intention was to train hard today. I enter the front doors, approach the desk, and do my usual check-in process. The girl checking me in has seen me a few times and knows my name by now to know what to enter and, so I believe she was comfortable in stating “We are having a debate”. It was kind of like an invitation. I ask what about in where her co-worker replies:
“the state of this country”.
She was down about where this country is headed and I do agree with her in some regard but I also find value here in America mainly because of Community College. She told me she agreed with me on that point, and told me a story about this Iranian woman who her worked her way mathematically to climb up and still struggling.
I said the wrong thing here because I kind of steered the conversation away from her friend struggling who is a mathematical genius to just being like math is not the universal language of life in my book. I look back at this and maybe I just jumped a couple of dots because maybe you need some marketing too mixed in the math to sell it. My zeal kind of activated here because what might be normal loud to me might be considered aggressive to some. Some customers came and she diverged to helping them, I continued talking to the friend but I do go into the gym because at this point if I have learned anything from my previous relationships I think I did something wrong or acted without thinking.
After she was done, she came back and I said “I’m sorry, I think I got aggressive” and she replied with “I’m sorry too I miscommunicated my point”. I felt some kind of connection here. I come from Community College and there is something humbling about it. We talked more, I told her about quitting my job to go to school in Baltimore and work over in the Shock Trauma Center which can be a overall sad place to be because it is a research hospital. She quit her job to part time and go to community college. More customers came, she left and I went to go do my gym things.
I thought about it a lot, but when I made a lot of these decisions I realized what I wanted to hear at the time as well and also maybe show a little respect for what I am trying to accomplish. Maybe it was kind of flirting as well because I was attracted to her but I also wanted to tell her my feelings. I went toward the men’s locker room and I went up to her and told her “I think it’s admirable what you are doing and I wish someone said that to me when I made that move years ago”. I think she was taken back a little. After I was done in the locker room I scurried rapidly towards the exit, I’m a little embarrassed maybe from being open.
I don’t look over but she yells from the front desk “I think what you did is admirable too!”. I come over back to her and I watch her eyes, I kind of look away because I’m shy to open up and maybe blush. I didn’t realize the impact of having someone yelling at me from a front desk of a gym would be on me but it was significant.
It’s good for me to remember these moments of happiness to remember who I truly am.
